Max strikes AGAIN!

Hi,

I am posting this while hiding under my bed with the covers over my head. No, not really but I do wish that Harry Potter's invisibility cloak truly existed and was in my possession for a few hours today.

How is that you can watch your two year old every second as he benignly plays and the minute you glance at another one of your children he is in mischief so deep there is no way out but utter embarrassment? Embarrassment for you that is, your two year old will think the whole affair is great fun.

Let us just say that a fire alarm was pulled at a public place that contained a hundred or more people. This one teeny fire alarm was somehow connected to about 200 flashing lights and 50 more fire alarms that were all going off in unison. If that wasn't enough warning that a two year old was not properly being watched by his mother, a recorded voice over the PA system announced that everyone needed to evacuate the building immediately. I had to make a counter announcement to the lady at the front desk that the chaos was nothing more than a two year old desiring to see what would happen when he pulled the red lever. Oh, and was she irritated. Apparently, she had no clue how to stop the sirens, lights and general noise-making. (I also don't think she has ever had a two year old.) Luckily, the humiliation only lasted about twenty minutes and thankfully the fire department did not arrive. (Although, on second thought, that might not have been such a bad thing. A little eye candy amidst ear-popping, mind numbing noise might have been nice, a silver lining even.)

A few other parents gave me a conspiratorial smile but I could not see the humor. I'm sure I will... in a few decades. As for Max, he was chastened for a moment at least. I'm pretty sure when he told me a few minutes later that he needed to go pee resulting in a dry pull-up and a successful potty moment that he was apologizing.

I'm surrounded!

I haven't posted about the delights of my gym going experience for awhile so I have decided to remedy that with this little nugget:

Dear Chubby Lady who sat next to me in Spin class today,

Please do not sing along to the songs while we are riding our bikes. It irritates me. You are not working hard enough if you can sing! Spin is not a recreational singing class. It is HARDCORE! Besides it is confusing because it really isn't over when the fat lady sings... it keeps going on and on and on and on....

Sincerely,

Erica who is grumpy when sweaty.

Dear nice older man with the crotch sweat stain,

I realize as a lady it is unseemly for me to notice this. However, I think you may have a particular problem because it is extremely difficult to miss as your bottom was in my line of sight for an entire hour. Khaki shorts aren't really the way to go if you want to hide bum sweat. It happens to all of us, we just hide it better. I would appreciate it if you would change your attire so that my ride could be a little more aesthetically pleasing.

Thank you,

No-where-to-look E.

It's official: Kate loves tennis! Who knew?

Touch-A-Truck

I took the kids to Touch-A-Truck today. I love the concept of kids being able to crawl all over various cars/trucks/motorcycles, etc. and touch/push/honk to their hearts content. My kids loved the idea too. Even the girls got really into it. It was good fun until Mom got a headache from all the honking. I noticed the people there had ear plugs in. I'll remember that for next time. My ears are still ringing. I hope the kiddies got "touching" cars out of their systems because my car can't take anymore love!

Mommy loves me!

Max is such a good sport during the week when I drag him to Costco, Target, and the grocery store--sometimes more than once. Today, I decided to treat him to a fun day at the park. He was so excited. I feel a little guilty for not taking him more. I am sort of burned out on the park. I firmly believe if you added up all the hours I spent in parks with my children it would equal at least a year of my life. So my new theory is to stay young and avoid parks as much as possible. There's only one problem: I would do anything for this face--even lose years off my life at the park.

Ella: The Ham

Scripture Study

We read 2 Nephi chapter 9 tonight. There are a lot of "wo's" and warnings in this chapter. I was feeling fairly good about my righteousness as I explained repentance and the atonement to the kids. The following were the reactions I got:

Kate: (Bursts into tears and wails) What if I don't make it to the Celestial Kingdom to be with Mommy? I know there are some things that I forgot to repent for! (Sob, sob.)

Ella: (Confidently) I don't think I'll make it to the Celestial Kingdom. I'm pretty sure I'll be in that second one. (A few moments later while I am trying desperately to calm everyone down.) I try to feel bad about some things that I do.

Jackson: I always feel bad about what I do!

Me: TIME FOR BED!!!