US

Create your own family sticker graphic at pYzam.com

The Question!

It happened.  I got the question.

The scene:  Happily driving the kids to the grocery store.  Not  a care in the world.   Feeling so good and righteous that I had the radio turned off and was actually talking to my children, even though a part of me had a great desire to be belting out Vampire Weekend songs.

Ella:  Mom, how does Heavenly Father put babies in a mommy's tummy?

Me: (heart pounding, sweating profusely) Ah, um...well, uh, you see...you have to grow up and get married and then you pray and hopefully, Heavenly Father sends you some children.

Kate: Mom, I need more details than that!

Me:  (Thinking: "Really, you do?  You're seven.") Okay, a Mom and a Dad each have special parts on their bodies and when they meet, it's possible to have a baby.  Hey, is that a bird flying in they sky over there? (They really like birds!)

Whew!  Hopefully, my bird subterfuge will buy me a few more years, so I can figure out what the HECK to say next time they want DETAILS.  

Tomorrow is the day...

Some of you may know that I have not eaten sugar for three plus months.  Well, It's my birthday and I'll eat sugar if I want to.  When you turn 33 years old, you just have to have  a treat to drown your sorrow in.  You ask yourself questions like, "How is this possible?" "How did I get so old?"  "Is that a new wrinkle?"  "Are my boobs saggy?" You realize that you have to enjoy life a little because soon you will be near death (a.k.a. 40!)  Think of me tomorrow night at my favorite Las Vegas buffet and give a little "oink", because I'll be PIGGING out.

P.S.  No cookies were harmed or eaten in the taking of this picture.  You cookies are all safe from me... at least until tomorrow night!  If you must know, my three little munchkins quickly devoured my cookie as soon as I was done taking the picture.  It was even difficult to get them to wait.  

Beans, beans the magical fruit...

Yes, I did really use that as my title.  

A couple of months ago, I was in a desperate situation.  I needed chocolate. BAD.  I had just started this sugar-free diet competition and was feeling in a very creative mood (read=crazy).  I was scouring the internet for healthy alternatives to the regular good stuff.  I found a recipe for Bean Brownies.  It sounded like a good idea.  I even read a glowing review of these things--just like regular brownies, thick and fudgy, perfect for a chocolate craving.   I could feel a little tickle of excitement in my taste-buds and I felt sure I had found the thing that would help me win this little competition.  Yes, my secret weapon. I could eat bean brownies until the cows came home while all my friends struggled with no sugar.  Soon, I would be the champion.  I would have a fancy crown and a sash that proclaimed my greatness.  Yes, (insert evil laughter and some hand rubbing here) this would be just the thing.  And so I faithfully blended up my black beans and made my brownies.  

While my fabulous fudgy creation cooked, I danced around the house in anticipation.  I even used them to bribe my kids into cleaning up messes.  AND IT WORKED!  These really must be the miracle of all miracle brownies, I thought. 

Fast forward thirty minutes of baking and cooling time.  I  quickly cut myself a piece and pop it in my mouth, before the kids notice they are out of the oven.  GAG.  GROSS.  Thick and Fudgy, they are not! Tasty, they are not!  Remotely like brownies, they are not!     Now I know why those Utah people say: "Oh, my Fudge" instead of swearing.  They must have been seduced by the bean brownie recipe, too.  

My kids are still traumatized by the Bean Brownie incident: If you are a reader of this blog, then you know that my sweet, trusting Ella requested brownies to celebrate her cast coming off. I made them for her and this is what happened:

Me:  Ella, why are you cutting your brownie up into such small pieces?

Ella:  I'm looking for beans.

It all adds up...

Robert-Bronchitis

Ella-Fever of 102+ sore throat

Jackson- Fever of 102.5 +sore throat

Max-Fever of 101+ new tooth

Leaky shower

Broken A/C unit

Malfunctioning security system

=

NO TIME TO BLOG.

The Cast-off party!

What's a girl to do after wearing her cast for three weeks? Why, swimming, of course!  Ella wasted no time--she was in the pool almost before I was in the door.  After a long swim, we had a celebratory dinner catered by Grimaldi's pizza--a favorite from NYC days.  Yes, there is one in Vegas and no, I will not tell you where it is.  It's a state secret.  I do accept bribes though. Also, some delicious (or so I am guessing from the tantrum that was thrown when I refused to let them have second helpings two minutes before bed!) brownies.   A Hollie Hobbie movie was watched along with a Miss Spider's Sunny Patch episode.  Fun was had by all and Mom was relieved that one more broken bone has finally healed.  

The latest project:

Feeling more Zen-like...see previous post.

And the gold medal goes to...

Max, for learning how to get from a laying position to a sitting one against all odds.  Or at least, surviving one brother and two sisters constant "help".

The silver medal goes to me for not throwing my computer on the ground and jumping on it because of my inability to upload any more pictures on blogger.  I keep getting internal errors.  ARGH!  I have like 15 cuter pics of Max. I'll have to try later when I've calmed down.