Yes, I did really use that as my title.
A couple of months ago, I was in a desperate situation. I needed chocolate. BAD. I had just started this sugar-free diet competition and was feeling in a very creative mood (read=crazy). I was scouring the internet for healthy alternatives to the regular good stuff. I found a recipe for Bean Brownies. It sounded like a good idea. I even read a glowing review of these things--just like regular brownies, thick and fudgy, perfect for a chocolate craving. I could feel a little tickle of excitement in my taste-buds and I felt sure I had found the thing that would help me win this little competition. Yes, my secret weapon. I could eat bean brownies until the cows came home while all my friends struggled with no sugar. Soon, I would be the champion. I would have a fancy crown and a sash that proclaimed my greatness. Yes, (insert evil laughter and some hand rubbing here) this would be just the thing. And so I faithfully blended up my black beans and made my brownies.
While my fabulous fudgy creation cooked, I danced around the house in anticipation. I even used them to bribe my kids into cleaning up messes. AND IT WORKED! These really must be the miracle of all miracle brownies, I thought.
Fast forward thirty minutes of baking and cooling time. I quickly cut myself a piece and pop it in my mouth, before the kids notice they are out of the oven. GAG. GROSS. Thick and Fudgy, they are not! Tasty, they are not! Remotely like brownies, they are not! Now I know why those Utah people say: "Oh, my Fudge" instead of swearing. They must have been seduced by the bean brownie recipe, too.
My kids are still traumatized by the Bean Brownie incident: If you are a reader of this blog, then you know that my sweet, trusting Ella requested brownies to celebrate her cast coming off. I made them for her and this is what happened:
Me: Ella, why are you cutting your brownie up into such small pieces?
Ella: I'm looking for beans.
