The Children's museum

The kids finally get to ride the horse.  I just had to chew out a mom whose kid was taking his turn and then some first.  Good times.  
Little Addison Cow would not look at the camera for anything.  I even promised a carrot.  Oh, wait I think that treat is for horses.  What do you offer cows?  Cow pies?  Hee. Hee.

Yeah, Ella's tough.

More Dinosaur Park

Dinosaur Park

And so it goes...

1.  I have a new fantasy.  In this fantasy, I never wash clothes.  I know this is politically incorrect and environmentally insensitive and wasteful, so I send my personal apologies to Al Gore and all the sweat shops (at least I'm saving water!).  As with every fantasy, I have more money than Al Gore, sorry again Al.  So here it goes: We are enjoying a lovely family dinner, sipping on red grape juice and eating gourmet spaghetti with the reddest of all red sauces, wearing gleaming white shirts.  (Did I mention that I look like Gwenyth Paltrow only with bigger boobs?).  AND THEN, J wipes his hand on his shirt instead of his napkin, E misses a noodle and it ends up on her lap, and not to be outdone, K dribbles some grape juice on her shirt.  I look around for baby M and see only spaghetti, I move a few strands  on this heaping mound and see some eyes peaking out at me.  Max.   Instead of the usual freak out, I laugh in a  let-them-eat-cake-Marie-Antoinette-way and smile at their spaghetti stained shirts knowing that tomorrow I will just buy new clothes and donate these soiled items, along with my obsolete washer and dryer to the less fortunate.  After all, someone will have to wash those dirty things.  Maybe I should throw in my bleach pen and Zout for extra goodness?  

2.  Did you know that the idiot who pays our bills has been sending her money for the power bill to the wrong account?  I know.  What kind of idiot does that?   I think I should fire her. Good thing she figured it out on the morning they were going to shut off our power.  That would have been bad, really bad.  No A/C in the middle of the scorching hot Vegas summer. Maybe that girl should get some more sleep.  

3.  Never leave your pool for three weeks without hiring someone to take care of it for you.  Unless of course, you like swimming in green algae and replacing pool filters.  If you do, then go ahead.  After all, a little slime with your swim just makes it exciting.  

I'm back, well, sorta...

I've been trapped under a pile of laundry that won't go a way.  I promise pics from our unusually long vacation soon.   Well, as soon as I can find my way out.  And as soon as I pay all the bills that piled up while I was away.  And clean the floor so my sweet little guy doesn't eat all the dust bunnies.  And as soon as I visit Target so I can baby proof everything since he learned to crawl on vacation.  Oh, and as soon as I get some school shopping done for the little monsters.  And buy some milk. 

US

Create your own family sticker graphic at pYzam.com

The Question!

It happened.  I got the question.

The scene:  Happily driving the kids to the grocery store.  Not  a care in the world.   Feeling so good and righteous that I had the radio turned off and was actually talking to my children, even though a part of me had a great desire to be belting out Vampire Weekend songs.

Ella:  Mom, how does Heavenly Father put babies in a mommy's tummy?

Me: (heart pounding, sweating profusely) Ah, um...well, uh, you see...you have to grow up and get married and then you pray and hopefully, Heavenly Father sends you some children.

Kate: Mom, I need more details than that!

Me:  (Thinking: "Really, you do?  You're seven.") Okay, a Mom and a Dad each have special parts on their bodies and when they meet, it's possible to have a baby.  Hey, is that a bird flying in they sky over there? (They really like birds!)

Whew!  Hopefully, my bird subterfuge will buy me a few more years, so I can figure out what the HECK to say next time they want DETAILS.